How Did It Come To This?!!

I’m not sure how it happened. I am riddled with disgust and self-loathing. I’ve compromised my standards; the standards my parents inculcated in me, as a young black boy growing up in the ghetto that is Upper Sydenham. It hurts me to write this, but I Sean J. Rankine have become…(deep breath)

one of those guys at the gym, who make noises when pushing weights.

I hate myself! Thankfully, I haven’t yet become the guy who gets up between each set of ten, walks over to the mirror and inspects the girth of the muscle group he is working. I don’t as yet walk as though I have had melons surgically implanted within each armpit. I don’t yet conclude all exercises with loud, and slightly camp “Wooooo!”

I do, however now conclude the last few lifts of the hardest sets with a low, but still audible hiss, which sometimes graduates to a grunt.

The shame is immeasurable. Please keep me in your prayers.

Thank you.

Some guy who probably grunts a whole heap more than I. Image via Wikipedia.


About The Other Me

Londoner born and raised. Living in Denmark. Occasional singer/songwriter, music fan, nearly author, recovering procrastinator. To read or listen to the amateur stuff I call my art, click on the picture and press the links to either my FB, Wordpress or bandcamp pages. Thanks
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27 Responses to How Did It Come To This?!!

  1. Sisyphus47 says:

    We’ll pray for you son, you’re on the right track 🙂 (but keep blogging!)

  2. looooool..I was expecting something terrible! lol..that made me laugh..I’ll be praying for you..*he he*

  3. I’m a girl and I grunt doing pullups. Very embarrassing. Glad there’s a pullup bar in our house now, haha.

  4. Claudia says:

    Hilarious! Almost had me choking on my lunch! Lol

  5. Virginia says:

    Hilarious! I literally laughed out loud!!

  6. tanicr says:

    Hahahah i cried laughing hahaahh i wish i went to the same gym as you hahhahah!!

  7. qmeer says:

    That’s hilarious! Just out of curiosity, are these ‘I am too bloody sexy’ grunts, or ‘I slightly constipated’ grunts? Now that you mention it, I think I dramatize my gym workouts too – dammit! But I swear it’s just whininess for me. Haha…

  8. NatesPOV says:

    You’re classic.. that last rep “TSSSSSSSST … HUH!” Looool

    In the Rulebook Of Men it clearly states;

    Grunting in the gym is only acceptable if:
    a) the weight was unbelievably heavy, and the grunt released pressure to stop your head flying off in a firework like fashion
    b) The weight was so heavy it forced your voicebox to change form, into a state of permanent low or high frequency noises
    c) There’s girls around, girls love guys who grunt

  9. gus says:

    As long as you are not spending as much time in the mirror as you are doing the exercises you are fine. Do your thing!

  10. Veage says:

    Haha,It happens to the best of us. Its better than what I do, which is try and hold in the grunt, until I collapse under the strain of the exercise and excess force in my chest. Great post.

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